Posts Tagged ‘agency’

1 February – Uuuggghhh…

February 1, 2009

Well it seems I spoke to soon.  After my second to last post where I was all ‘la la la, my energy levels are fabulous on these new meds, they must be working, la la la”, I (I guess inevitably) woke up the following Monday morning feeling as though I had been hit by a bus.  Suddenly, literally from one day to the next my energy levels were AWOL, I felt bloated, heavy, exhausted.  It’s bizarre because initially I never really felt bad.  Yes I was pretty tired bout then my little man doesn’t sleep (like…ever, LOL) so I just figured that was why…but when I started these new meds I immediately just became my old self again!  Normal suddenly seemed super-human, and it was so, so nice to be so energetic again.  Now that I’m back to my ‘old’ self it’s awful and I’m really battling to adjust to the fatigue and exhaustion.  The only good thing about giving in and taking the Eltroxin (if it comes to that) is the hope that it will then make me feel like I was feeling a few weeks ago.  A-MAZING 🙂

I’m still taking all the meds, everything as recommended but it’s as if I’ve suddenly become immune to them.  I can’t say I’m not disappointed, because now suddenly I feel as though any hope of curing my thyroid problem naturally is gone.  I’m still clinging on to the hope that I may be wrong – after all no matter how healthy and ‘normal’ our bodies are nobody feels like an energiser bunny ALL of the time…but my gut feeling is that this is not working anymore.

Regardless though I am very excited – my next homeopath appointment will be in 5 days or so, and then we should (hopefully!!!) be able to move forward with surrogacy stuff!  If the meds HAS worked then I’ll be able to contact the agency with “I’m cured and ready to move forward!” and if it hasn’t worked I’ll contact them to say “I’m taking Eltroxin and ready to move forward”.  So big yay for that!  I’ll most probably have my appointment on Thursday/Friday, and will update after that!!  Yaaaay 🙂

Advertisements

18 October – What gets to me…

October 18, 2008

…just a little bit.

I know that embarking on this surrogacy adventure I’m going to need to grow a thick skin, as people are bound to have their own views and many of them won’t be shy to express them.  But here is the first thing that has started to kind of get under my skin on this journey.

Whenever I tell a new person (family, friend etc) that I intend on being a gestational surrogate (GS) they look a bit taken aback but riveted.  The very next question is ‘Who for?’.  The *second* I answer (‘I don’t know yet, I will be matched through an agency’) I’ve pretty much lost them.  ‘Wow. I can understand being a GS for someone you really love and respect…but for someone you don’t even know? No ways’ (accompanied by frowning and vigorous head shaking).  Subtext: you’re crazy lady.  Also, you’re a cold weirdo that can just give away a child without good reason.  Also you’re not looking out for your own family by doing something so rash.  etc etc.

Maybe I’m blowing it out of proportion – but people really seem shocked, and dare I say, unimpressed that I am willing to do this for a family I don’t yet know.

The fact is, if I knew a family that desperately wanted and needed help in creating their family I would love nothing more than to help them out.  But guess what, all of my close family and friends are either procreating on their own steam, or not ready to have kids yet.  So what? I should just *not* be a GS purely because by chance I don’t know the family that requires my help yet?  Seriously??  What about all the wonderful people out there that I just happen not to have met yet?  I want to help, they want help…so what’s the problem??

I mean, family we’re born into, but what is friendship other than a series of random encounters that eventually (through some deeper connection based on love and trust) develop into something more?

Of course I want to know, and love and trust my future IP’s, and I’m confident that I will.  I’ll find that connection, and the best thing will come of it.  A brand new family.

I do understand that people are surprised when they first hear about this journey.  But it gets me that often they are negative before even really listening to my responses.  And by then of course, they are so blinded by their own fog of negativity that they’re not really listening to my responses anyway.  They’re too busy thinking of yet another reason why this is a bad idea.

Even my gynaecologist (and yes thank you, AF stayed away long enough for me to have my check-up yesterday, so thanks for those no-AF vibes 😉  ) looked at me as if I was nuts.  He was very kind, very supportive, very sweet.  But definitely thought I was losing the plot.

Anyway, I’m sure on my journey I’ll come across many more irritating things…it’s all good – I’ll learn to suck it up and I’m sure, even laugh about it.  I was watching some video clips on You Tube where former GS Minette Trent talks about her journey and she mentioned wearing a maternity T-shirt with “Not my husband’s baby” emblazoned on the front, and “Not mine either!” on the back. Now *that’ll* get people talking 🙂 🙂

I really want to get me one of those shirts 😉

15 October – Things in the pipeline..

October 15, 2008

Things are moving along as smoothly as can be expected!

1. I have an exam scheduled with my own gynae this week friday.  This is not in any way a requirement of the agency, but I just felt it makes sense to speak to someone that knows my full history and has only *my* interests at heart about this decision.  Since the CIN1 I also never miss an opportunity to go for a check-up, so it seemed like a good idea all around.

The only spanner in the works is that when I made the appointment 3 weeks ago I accepted the first available slot and never considered where I would be in my cycle.  True as nuts I’m due to come on any day now, and have experienced mild cramping all morning.  I’m still sitting tight and holding thumbs that AF does not arrive before Friday, but I know Murphy and his stupid Law so chances are it’ll happen. *sigh*.  In that case I’ll phone the gynae’s offices and ask if I can reschedule.  I really want to get this done asap though so here’s hoping…!


2. I have finally managed to secure an appointment for my psychological screening.  This will happen next Wednesday morning.  Once my I’ve finished the consult I can apparently expect it to takes up to 2 weeks for the report on me to be compiled and filed with the agency, so I won’t be holding my breath.


3. I’ve approached a couple of friends and family members to compile some references for me, which the agency also requires.  I’m hoping to be able to send these to the agency within the next few days.


Once all the above are sorted (and assuming everything is in order) we’ll start planning my trip to Cape Town / Johannesburg for my medical workup, meeting with lawyers and a social worker – and to meet IP’s!!!  I’m so very excited about that trip, can’t wait for things to get moving now.


BUT in the meantime we are getting there..that’s the main thing!

Please send non-AF vibes until Friday lunchtime, lol.

8 October – The Phonecall update

October 8, 2008

Soooo…we did the Agency phonecall today and I think it went really well.  It was a great way to open up contact a little more, and to help us get a better sense of each other.  She had a few questions for me and also spent a lot of time explaining the processes to me.  She herself is a veteran of 17 IVF’s so she definitely knows what I am (will be) through from a medical point of view!  It was really a good phonecall.  I’m so happy to be with this agency 🙂  She was also very happy to answer all of my questions and to allay my fears and worries.

I couldn’t be more excited to get this off the ground now!!!

Next step is for Nurture (the agency) to do a background check on me and to arrange a psychological evaluation.  Assuming that those both go smoothly (lol, I’ll be pretty concerned if they don’t!) we’ll then start making travel plans to Cape Town or Johannesburg for me, for a night.  This will be quite a whirlwind trip where I will meet a social worker, lawyer, have a medical work-up and meet possible IP’s.  Exciting stuff!

Because each individual process takes time it’ll probably be 5/6 weeks before we get to that point though.

So next up for me is my gynae appointment next Friday.  Here’s hoping he has only good news for me and my uterus 🙂

6 October – Excited!!!

October 6, 2008

Well, as you can imagine I’ve been doing nothing but eating, sleeping and dreaming surrogacy for the past while!  I’m getting so, so excited to take things to the next level!

I got some amazing advice (thank you so much to all the wonderful ladies that posted!) on my last post and have decided that as this is something I truly, deeply want to do I am going to go with my gut and Just Do It.  As I mentioned before the things that have been worrying at me a little bit aren’t the major things – they’re the details.  And the more I think about it the more I know I can live with them!

Next step now is the big phonecall with the agency.  They usually do a one-on-one meeting but seeing as there are about 1300km between us we’ll do a phonecall ‘interview’ first, and if things go well then we’ll consider when and how to take it to the next level.

In the meantime I’ve also decided to book an appointment with my own gynae.  I would really like someone that knows me and my history (CIN1, pregnancies etc) to give me an opinion on being a gestational surrogate.  He can also do a pap to ensure that all is good before I cost anyone else time and money for nothing!  My appointment is booked for next Friday, so I’ll update as and when I get results!  Please cross fingers that I get a green light – I trust and value this man very much so if he tells me not to take this any further I’ll have to believe he has very good reason for saying so!  That said though I’ve carried two incredibly easy and healthy pregnancies to term though, so I can’t imagine why there would be any issues!

I’ll update after Wednesday’s phonecall 🙂