26 January – Question??

Thanks for the comments in my last post, they really all meant so much to me!  And I appreciate all the encouraging words so much at this stage, so thank you all!

Now a quick question – I got a comment mentioning doing a “natural cycle with FET” and therefore “no need for BCP”.  Being a newbie to this I had no idea what FET means, so I googled and came up with Frozen Embryo Transfer and Fresh Embryo Transfer.  Now this natural cycle IVF REALLY appeals to me, I am admittedly a bit nervous of doing all those shots during the IVF, but I am very much prepared and willing to go through it if that’s what it takes – but if there’s an alternative way????  Why I’d be welcoming it with open arms!  Mostly I just don’t like the idea of pumping my body full of meds, chemicals and hormones if there was a way to avoid it…so can anyone explain to me exactly what a “natural cycle with FET” entails and under what circumstances it is viable?

Obviously at the end of the day the decision would be made by my IP’s and FS, but I’m still quite far away from that at the moment so I just want to know what the basic conditions are.  I.e. do you need frozen embryo’s (to help with the timing in case my cycle isn’t 100% spot on that month) or does it also work with fresh ones?  I read that you need quite a predictable cycle, my cycle is always between 26-30 days, and my luteal phase is always 12 days, no LP defect etc etc – would that be considered predictable enough?

Any info would be greatly appreciated, I have tried googling for info but it’s all either too basic, or far too complicated – and I just can’t seem to get the answers I need, LOL.  If it’s easier you’re welcome to email the info to me at yv*ytur*ner@ho*tma*il.com (without the stars, lol).

15 October – Things in the pipeline..

Things are moving along as smoothly as can be expected!

1. I have an exam scheduled with my own gynae this week friday.  This is not in any way a requirement of the agency, but I just felt it makes sense to speak to someone that knows my full history and has only *my* interests at heart about this decision.  Since the CIN1 I also never miss an opportunity to go for a check-up, so it seemed like a good idea all around.

The only spanner in the works is that when I made the appointment 3 weeks ago I accepted the first available slot and never considered where I would be in my cycle.  True as nuts I’m due to come on any day now, and have experienced mild cramping all morning.  I’m still sitting tight and holding thumbs that AF does not arrive before Friday, but I know Murphy and his stupid Law so chances are it’ll happen. *sigh*.  In that case I’ll phone the gynae’s offices and ask if I can reschedule.  I really want to get this done asap though so here’s hoping…!

2. I have finally managed to secure an appointment for my psychological screening.  This will happen next Wednesday morning.  Once my I’ve finished the consult I can apparently expect it to takes up to 2 weeks for the report on me to be compiled and filed with the agency, so I won’t be holding my breath.

3. I’ve approached a couple of friends and family members to compile some references for me, which the agency also requires.  I’m hoping to be able to send these to the agency within the next few days.

Once all the above are sorted (and assuming everything is in order) we’ll start planning my trip to Cape Town / Johannesburg for my medical workup, meeting with lawyers and a social worker – and to meet IP’s!!!  I’m so very excited about that trip, can’t wait for things to get moving now.

BUT in the meantime we are getting there..that’s the main thing!

Please send non-AF vibes until Friday lunchtime, lol.

2 September – SO we had the big chat!

Apologies for my premenstrual post from last week, lol.  I still feel I had some cause to be disgruntled but in all fairness I hadn’t really talked it through with the poor man and he didn’t even know how desperately I want this.  AND I was seriously PMS’ing (cycles have only just started again since Jamie was born 14 months ago, so yah, bit or a shock to the system!).  So, riggggggggggght.  Moving along swiftly 😉

So I’ve still been eating, sleeping, dreaming (reading) surrogacy every day, and I’ve really decided (over and over) that I WANT this.  I think I’ve thought through just about every scenario from what if I need to be hospitalised for a D&C to what if I want to go on an overseas holiday whilst carrying someone elses baby.  And *I* can make peace with everything.

Had a really good moment with dh this evening (it was quiet, the kids were in bed, we were just chatting and giggling – RELAXED) and I opened up to him about how badly I want to do this.  I told him that I’ve thought about this, I’ve researched it and I really want to go ahead, but that I also need him to fully support me.  I asked him to take whatever time he needs to research it himself and get his own questions answered, and then let me know how he feels, and whether he thinks he could get his head around it.  If he’s not totally on board with me then I will drop it.  We chatted a bit about the various risks and possibilities – he seemed a bit taken aback, I definitely don’t think he had realised quite how serious I was – yet he was not at all negative.  He didn’t give too much away besides finding it hilarious that I’ll need to see a shrink (to get into the surrogacy program) – LOL.  Clearly he sees a psychological evaluation as a potential stumbling block for me!

But yah, I’m feeling really happy that it’s out there and at least for now we’re on the same page.  I feel like we’ve connected in a whole new way and if he really isn’t keen I will NOT try to convince him, I will accept it (probably enrol in an egg donor program) and who knows, maybe one day he’ll change his mind.

I’m trying not to get my hopes up too much but I really have a good feeling about this and am really excited.  This could really happen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Please hold thumbs and think of us! 🙂